Mother

Apply Yourself

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Apply Yourself, haha, Ok Sarah sit down and write this post, you’ve been avoiding it by doing fun Riley related posts – Commit Damn it!!!

Today’s post asks to describe our last attempt to learn something that did not come easily to us.

FAR OUT! I don’t know when to start. Nothing really has ever come easy to me ‘’education’’ wise. Truth be told, I stuffed around at school!! Never gave a rats ass or really applied myself – AND I regret It majorly now!!! I still don’t know my times tables, can’t read an analogue watch or spell very well and my grammar skills suck – But I can recite nearly all the song lyrics in my mass collection of music. I’m going to learn how to tell the time and my times tables when I have to teach those things to Riley, We’ll learn together – I Hope – NO I WILL learn them, because I won’t be able to put it off any longer, I’ll have no choice, Riley can’t think he has a dumbass for a mother.

When I left school and got a Job/Traineeship I completed three administration type TAFE certificates at TAFE. I tried harder at TAFE because it was important for my Job and I was older and cared a little bit more. Later on I attempted to do the next level, a diploma by OTEN distance education. There was a five year or so gap when I hadn’t been doing any kind of study and I just couldn’t seem to pick it back up again, not sitting in my own home, with my short attention span and it was boring.

I tried again after that to do a creative writing course by correspondence. I thought maybe enjoying the topic might make it easier, but ended up pregnant for most of it, and I never managed to complete it!

So I failed twice at long distance education, it’s not for me, I need a classroom set up to learn at my optimum.

The nuts and bolts of being a Mother I found came easy, Feed Baby, Wash Baby, Change Baby, Love Baby and Play with Baby. I read a bunch of educational pregnancy and baby books while I was pregnant, but all that really ended up doing was overwhelming me and stressing me out. As of yet haven’t been able to learn how to manage all the new shit in my life with all the old shit and that causes me quite a bit of trouble.

I am stressed trying to write this post, I’m getting angry because on this topic words do not flow easy for me, I wonder if it shows in the writing. Riley is asking for my attention by slapping the keyboard whenever I try and type, so I’m going to go play and this will have to do for the day!

365daysofprompts Post 19 of 365 (missed 4)

 

Riley

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A Poem to My Son.

The stars up above are shining bright, I will stay close by you till its light.

Though the daylight may lead me away, I’ll always come back, love works that way.

While you lay still and dream your dreams, Loves all around you, I’ll always be on your team.

How much I love, you’ll never know, but each and every day I’ll try to show.

A big strong boy into whom you shall grow, a long happy life you shall know.

Friends and adventures, you’ll have more than a few, awesomeness inside you I grew.

You’ll love Kittens, Rats, Puppies and Quails, in fact all animals, even the ones without a tail.

Trains, Planes, Cars and 4WD’s, you’ll use them all to travel wide.

No matter how far Riley you roam from home, you’ll always have love around you wherever you go.

 

 

Children Learn What They Live

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Children Learn What They Live, By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.

If children with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.

If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.

If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.

If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.

If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.

If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.

If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.

If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.

If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.

If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.

If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.

If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.

If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.

If children live with fairness, they learn justice.

If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.

If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.

If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

Before my son was born, when we were doing our parenting classes at the John Hunter Hospital, this (the above) was given as a handout to all expectant parents, I really liked it and it stuck with me, so I thought I would share it with you all.

Dorothy Law Nolte was an American writer, she wrote a column in a newspaper about raising children and she was family counselor who was born in 1924 and died in 2005.  – also I’d just like to point out that she wrote this in 1972!

Shopping Sadness

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I ducked up the street to grab a few groceries while my hubby was on his lunch break so I could leave my son at home. I’ve decided I’d prefer to take him, I feel rather lonely walking around the super market without his smiling face looking back at me and at least when my sons with me I can talk out loud without looking strange, because people just think I’m talking to him.

Feeling Guilty

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I find it hard to relax when I have things to do, house work, feed the kiddlet, play with the kiddlet, more house work, paid job work.  I feel guilty sitting down reading when there are things to be done and there is always ALWAYS things to be done.   All I want for Christmas is a sleep-in and a relaxing day reading preferably by a nice pool – is that too much to ask?

Riley’s First Christmas

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This Christmas will be my sons first and to celebrate I’ve put together a post in photos of us putting up our Christmas tree – there is a story behind this old hand me down tree, but I’ll get to that after the photos :-).

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Hmmm what is it, can i eat it?

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Dad where are you going with my new toy?

My son, Riley proceeded to giggle at me as I fluffed out the fake leaves and rearranged the branches. Riley and his father then just sat and watched me decorate the tree.

IMG_9672      IMG_9655 Hmmm what is it?

IMG_9660 Can I have it?

IMG_9664 Hmmm now what should I do with it?

IMG_9666 Can I eat it?

IMG_9667 Yep! gunna try and eat it!

IMG_9668 First Christmas

(this is the ornament Riley tried to eat while I was trying to get a photo of him with it)

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My tree & table decorations – while these are probably not as fancy as some of you have and I only decorate one room in my house, the dining room. When I lived at home we only decorated one room, the living room and this tree is the very tree that my grandmother and I would decorate every year with mostly the very same decorations. I’m about to turn 27 so the tree has to be at least twenty five years old (ish) and I love it, I look at it and I’m ten years old again, I look at it and I’m home. It still has a few of the same wooden ornaments I played with as a kid. I can remember going into Grace Brothers with my mother and buying a new angel for the top and I still use her today. About three years ago I inherited this tree and with it a box of old decorations from my mother.

Now back to the decorating ritual – as i remember it – on the first of December every year my Nanma (my maternal grandmother) would come over and we would decorate the tree, mum was doing who knows what at the time, but Nanma and I would decorate the tree and I loved it. I am not sure why or how it started, but i always looked forward to decorating this tree, and i know it was the doing it with my grandmother part that made it fun, cause it’s kinda stressful on your own. This year I did it myself with Riley watching on (OK my husband put the actual tree bit together for me), but I’m thinking next year I’m going to make my mother come over and decorate it with Riley while I go drink some wine and she and he can carry on the tradition.

I am very much looking forward to this Christmas and i hope i can instill in my son my love for Christmas, the real Christmas, being with family and friends and celebrating being together!

Today was a first: I took Ellie and Riley for a walk together

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Today was a first: I took Ellie and Riley for a walk together.

Normally when I go for a walk it’s just my son and I and if my husband comes he brings the dogs. I can’t hold onto all three – 1. Riley in the Pram 2. Buster our big old boy 3. Ellie our younger female dog. Today, in light of Ellie’s boredom and recent destructive behavior, I decided to take her with my son and I on our regular walk.

Surely I thought, I can manage one dog and the pram.

Mission One; trying to get Ellie out of the yard without Buster coming – oh fudge knuckle why must these two follow each other everywhere, but at last success.

Mission Two; trying to give the old  boy a treat to chew on while we’re gone because I feel guilty he can’t come, Ellie  nearly eats my hand, but success and the correct dog ends up with it.

Mission Three; figure out how to walk without pulling the pram over, damn why must this dog keep switching sides, why can’t she pick one, I then decided I was going to try and force her to stay on my left, yeah right. SO we’re walking, we’re walking, it’s all good. I then started to notice she wasn’t being her normal boisterous self, walk past a gate and a dog barks at us, she hides behind me – umm Ellie Girl, where’s my Ellie you normally bark back. We’re walking, we’re walking, little white fluffy dog runs up to us, Ellie try’s to hide behind me, then lays down and cowers on the ground, ummm hello Ellie at home you regularly rough and tumble with a dog twice your size – oh then it dawns on me, Busters not here, she’s only tough when the big old boys with us, hahahahaha.

Damn it Ellie stop hiding behind me I’m not going to save you girl – Well that’s not true there was one occasion before I had my son when Ellie and I went out for an early morning walk and a dog came running out at us, I freaked out and lifted her as high in the air as I could, but that’s another story, and I never walked near there after that.

Mission four; trying to get a descent photo of Ellie and the pram while we were walking . . . . . got two that’ll do.

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Come home, put Ellie back out the back and she’s all over Buster, acting like she hasn’t seen him in days lol funny dog, hope she remembers how happy she was to see him when their competing for prime sleeping positions tonight.

So In conclusion I did manage one dog and the pram and I know if I keep doing it she’ll get used to it and it’ll get easier.

Tinsel Overdose

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Today I found myself thinking ‘‘hmmm how many days until the 1st of December, I want to decorate the house’’ then I was like ‘’EWWWWWW who is this person in my head, GET OUT’’.

I then sat and pondered ‘’No I am aloud to look forward to and get excited about Christmas, because at Christmas I get to see my family’’.

Fuck you consumer materialism and hallmark for making me feel so dirty. I went to the Shops yesterday to get some photos printed and nearly vomited and had a tinsel overdose.

Remember people this is supposed to be a time to reflect on love and family, not be drowned in bullshit. Everyone gets so amped up, stressed and agro around Christmas time, be nice to each other people that’s the fucking point, car park rage retards I’m talking to you, pull your heads in.

But no – I’m aloud to get excited – I love being with my family, immediate and extended.

So Woo Hoo, Bring on what will be my sons first Christmas. Love, Peace and Family that’s what Christmas is about.

Going for a walk

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Image

I went for a walk today along the water near where I live for the first time since I started back at work part time.

It had been three weeks and when I’m not walking regularly I forget how much I enjoy it and how good I feel afterwards. It’s rather shocking how much tension we can build up in our systems and I always find a brisk walk helps to ease it – Vodka and Chocolate would work also, but I think the walks a healthier and less hangover inducing option.

In the four months I got to stay at home with my son we’d daily enjoy going for a walk then coming home, having a bath, then a nap. So today was nice, just my son and I doing our thing. It’s amazing how a simple thing like going out into the fresh air and sunshine for a walk can make everything better.